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Published on June 17th, 2013 | by 011100110110010

18

The Day Matt Cutts Snapped

Welcome dear reader. Once again the best stuff on this blog is written or made by other people, today I pass this gift on to you.

Today we have a guest post by Patrick Hathaway, who is currently the in-house SEO for promotional gifts company Ideasbynet, although he will be joining Hit Reach shortly (and has already started building links for them…) You may have seen Patrick around on your travels by The Saloon and previous posts on this humble blog are here and zere.

Yeah, thanks Sean…

The following image was sent to me via a close source within the Google webspam department. A warning notice email that Google are desperate to keep under wraps.

It is said that Matt was working ridiculous hours and was slowly starting to unravel. Exhausted after writing every GWT warning notice manually he just flipped, came in with a Bing tattoo on his forehead and was babbling on about how he was going to start his own fucking payday loans company.

My source has also begged that I keep this image under my hat or share it within a small circle of peers, knowing the traffic numbers on this blog I knew it would be safe here.

Please be sure to read this fully and please, whatever you do, please don’t share this with anyone else.

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The Day Matt Cutts Snapped, 8.5 out of 10 based on 19 ratings

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About the Author

One day I will make a living out of this industry, until then I'll carry on writing here.



18 Responses to The Day Matt Cutts Snapped

  1. Emma says:

    Haha, awesome.

    First thing I think of with the phrase “piss taker” is this scene in hot fuzz http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcSg6dAZ03w (favourite comedy film ever)

    Google might as well say “good luck with that one” for some re-cons I’ve had to do… good old Google.

    Amazing.

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  2. Cheers Emma!
    I wish Matt would have actually sent that out. He bottled it IMO.

    P.S. Hot Fuzz isn’t better than Wedding Crashers

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    • Emma says:

      I’ve not seen Wedding Crashers so… (I’m a really picky comedy fan though. Hot Fuzz is one of few I can actually watch more than once – Rush Hour 2/3 being others)

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  3. He has far more restraint then I do…. That email would of been sent with the understanding that I would have to ask for forgiveness later lol

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  4. Dustin Verburg says:

    Your reverse psychology didn’t work on me, Patrick. I am CLOSE PERSONAL FRIENDS with Matt Cutts (we play Xbox and Microsoft Flight Simulator together all the time and we have matching iPhones) and I just texted him the link. I think I might have gotten the URL wrong though since I don’t speak binary… but the point is, he’s Matt Cutts and he’ll find it.

    Also my dad is an astronaut/viking.

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  5. Patrick says:

    yup, got the same notice yesterday from a blog I pushed a little too hard on.

    I like that Google is really starting to speak their minds and be a little bit more transparent.

    although a little bit offensive, it is good to see the “real” side of Google.

    good share!

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  6. Roald says:

    Awesome post! Really love the PS part :)

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    • See Patrick, it was worth the extra time to add it at the end. #QualityContent

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      • Good shout Sean, and thanks for the formatting idea – works way better that way.

        Glad your esteemed readership seemed to enjoy it.

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  7. i don't know says:

    I’ve been getting trailed by a shadowy figure wearing unichrome polos. at first I thought it was just that dude hiding in my closet to ensure I quit smoking cigs, but I have an eerie feeling about off page GWT warnings becoming more of ‘a thing,’

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  8. “…came in with a Bing tattoo on his forehead…” BRB. I have to wipe coffee splatter off my screen.

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  9. Strategus says:

    Lol. Enjoy the traffic from Bing )))

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  10. Andy kinsey says:

    Super, post – not sure it’s real

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  11. Andrea Moro says:

    That doesn’t really sound too geek to me … ups too 01100111011001010110010101101011

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  12. GreenVasco says:

    LOL at “enjoy all your traffic from Bing”. The shouuld really send this kind of email, and maybe people will actually stop spamming the internet. Great post.

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  13. George says:

    Dustin,

    No one cares you are e-friends with matt cutts.

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  14. Matt Cutts says:

    Good one!

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